Friday, November 8, 2013

SADNESS

Sadness is...

- I wake up cold and restless on a couch, when I finally got adjusted to sleeping in your warm bed.
- Making myself cry thinking about having made you cry.
- I have to ask for a ride and walk everywhere, when you used to have me soaring.
- Still going to the gym to workout and never feeling weaker.
- Starting to look forward to work for the distraction, when you used to be my distraction from work.
- You show up in my worst nightmares instead of my sweetest dreams.
- Owning up to my mistakes and realizing how wrong and fearful I have been all along, for nothing.
- Upset that you never did anything, but love me.
- Nervous I will never eat a cookie again without thinking of my favorite one.
- I find out twice a week I didn't win the lottery, when I had hit the jackpot a long time ago.
- Crying knowing I have no one to blame, but myself.
- Knowing I need to act, when I keep thinking that I'll scare you away forever.

Heal us Jesus. I'm not afraid to work for it. For you. For me.



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